Tilting at Windmills

Joe Castiglione is a brilliant genius.

John Roddick, brother of tennis great and fashion model-banger Andy Roddick, was hired to replace John Lockwood as Oklahoma’s tennis coach last month. John has been running Roddick Total Tennis in Austin, a “performance boarding academy” for budding tennis kids. I think that means mommy and daddy pay an asston of money to send their kids away to Roddick so they don’t have to deal with them for the summer.

At any rate, Roddick was an assistant tennis coach at his alma mater, Georgia, when the Dawgs advanced to the NCAA finals in 2002. His main credential, though, is obviously his last name. This is why Joe C’s a flippin genius.

Boomer Sooner, chaps!

How many high school tennis stars do you think watched today’s Wimbledon broadcast and saw John Roddick decked out head-to-toe in Sooner gear with John McEnroe giving platitudes to the school by saying (paraphrasing): “they give scholarships in tennis, too? I thought all the money went to the football program!” With brother Andy advancing to Sunday’s finals, OU should get even more international TV time. I guesstimate the free advertising is in the range of eleventy million dollars.

They actually showed John a lot more earlier in the broadcast and I wasn’t watching, so I didn’t get a good shot of him. If somebody has a better one, please forward. The one I have, though, gives us a good glimpse of brother Andy’s squeeze, Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Brooklyn Decker.

Here’s a better shot of the lovely Mrs. Roddick:

I'd serve and volley it.

So, high school tennis phenoms, come to OU and maybe you’ll hang out with Andy Roddick and his smokin’ hot wife. Other high school football/basketball/who gives a shit what the sport is phenoms, come to OU and maybe you’ll hang out with Andy Roddick’s smokin’ hot wife.

I’m checking my eligibility.

The University of Oklahoma just stepped up to the plate and again and made it even harder for Bob Stoops to leave, if he ever wanted to in the first place.

Stoops is set to become college football’s first $5 million man in the 2011 season.

Indeed we do.

According to the Tulsa World:

Stoops’ reworked deal, which was extended two years through Dec. 31, 2015, allows for a current guaranteed $2.975 million. It also calls for a $700,000 annual stay bonus, first payable Oct. 1. Meaning, when Stoops takes the sideline for the next OU-Texas game, he’ll be making $3.675 million.

An additional bonus, termed in the contract an “Additional Stay Benefit,” of $800,000 will be paid following Jan. 1, 2011. Factoring in the $700,000 bonus already in place, as well as the automatic $200,000 annual private-funds bump also built into the contract, Stoops stands to make $4.875 million in 2011. And that’s before performance-based bonuses also included in the deal. Should the Sooners compete for the Big 12 championship and a BCS bowl that season, as is typical under the coach, Stoops would clear the $5 million mark.

All told, his seven-year pact is worth $30.125 million.

It’s “interesting” that the story didn’t list Stoops’ performance bonus should he actually win a frickin’ BCS game, but I digress.

Stoops wasn’t the only benafactor of OU Regents’ largesse, though. Jeff Capel was rightfully extended through the 2016 season, receiving annual raises that will culminate in a guaranteed $2.84 mil in the 2013-14 season. The salary includes a retention bonus of $1.1 mil, payable on June 30, 2014. That’s a nice incentive to retain the services of a guy that will have every open job in the country thrown at him in the next five years.