Tilting at Windmills

Oklahoma placed eight (8) players on the first team preseason All-Big 12 team, selected by the ubiuqitous “media reps who cover the conference.”

2008 Heisman-winner Sam Bradford was named Preseason Offensive Player of the Year. Nebraska defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh is the preseason pick for Defensive Player of the year and Baylor’s Phil Taylor, a defensive tackle transfer from Penn State who sat out 2008, is the media’s pick for Newcomer of the Year.

The Big 12 South put 22 of 26 players on the squad (including OSU’s Dez Bryant, who is listed at both wide receiver and punt returner). OU’s dominant defensive line was rewarded with two players on the first team, Gerald McCoy and Jeremy Beal.

Other Sooners on the first team are Jermaine Gresham, Trent Williams, Demarco Murray, Travis Lewis and Dominque Franks.

Here’s the full list:

OFFENSE
WR Dez Bryant, Oklahoma State, 6-2, 215, Jr, Lufkin, Texas
TE Jermaine Gresham, Oklahoma, 6-6, 258, Sr, Ardmore, Okla.
OL Russell Okung, Oklahoma State, 6-6, 305, Sr, Fort Bend, Texas
OL Trent Williams, Oklahoma, 6-5, 318, Sr, Longview, Texas
C Chris Hall, Texas, 6-4, 295, Sr, Irving, Texas
OL Adam Ulatoski, Texas, 6-6, 310, Sr, Southlake, Texas
OL Brandon Carter, Texas Tech, 6-7, 354, Sr, Longview, Texas
WR Dezmon Briscoe, Kansas, 6-3, 202, Jr, Dallas, Texas
QB Sam Bradford, Oklahoma, 6-4, 223, Jr, Oklahoma City, Okla.
RB Kendall Hunter, Oklahoma State, 5-8, 190, Jr, Tyler, Texas
RB DeMarco Murray, Oklahoma, 6-1, 214, Jr, Las Vegas, Nev.
PK Alex Henery, Nebraska, 6-2, 175, Jr, Omaha, Neb.
KR Perrish Cox, Oklahoma State, 6-0, 195, Sr, Waco, Texas

DEFENSE
DL Ndamukong Suh Nebraska 6-4 300 Sr/3L Portland, Ore.
DL Gerald McCoy, Oklahoma, 6-4, 297, Jr, Oklahoma City, Okla.
DL Jeremy Beal, Oklahoma, 6-3, 261, Jr, Carrollton, Texas
DL Sergio Kindle, Texas, 6-4, 255, Sr, Dallas, Texas
LB Sean Weatherspoon, Missouri, 6-2, 245, Sr, Jasper, Texas
LB Joe Pawelek, Baylor, 6-2, 240, Sr, San Antonio, Texas
LB Travis Lewis, Oklahoma, 6-2, 232, So, San Antonio, Texas
DB Darrell Stuckey, Kansas, 6-1, 205, Sr, Kansas City, Kan.
DB Jordan Lake, Baylor, 6-1, 215, Sr, Houston, Texas
DB Dominique Franks, Oklahoma, 6-0, 192, Jr, Tulsa, Okla.
DB Earl Thomas, Texas, 5-10, 197, So, Orange, Texas
P Derek Epperson, Baylor, 6-3, 235, Jr, Southlake, Texas
PR Dez Bryant, Oklahoma State, 6-2, 215, Jr, Lufkin, Texas

We start our in-depth look at the Big 12 landscape this year in the North where graduations affect some, not so much others and, when it comes down to it, scheduling could play the most important part.

The look from here says Nebraska’s combination of scheduling and defense should be enough to get them to the Big 12 championship game at Jerryworld in December. It won’t be easy, though, as Kansas may have something to say about it, as will question marks in the offense.

1. Nebraska

Bill Callahan nearly ran a once-proud program into the ground. At times, he seemed more concerned with throat-slashes, fans “throwing fruit,” and being a general all-around asshat than he did coaching the Big Red machine. Former Husker assistant Bo Pelini took over the helm last season, turning around a team that had gone 5-7 in 2007 (just their second losing season in 40 years – both of them under Callahan) and guided them to 10 wins and a Gator Bowl win.

Pelini will be replacing quarterback Joe Ganz, who threw for 3,500 yards and 25 touchdowns in 2008. Sophomore Zac Lee looks to be the one getting the nod, although he’s only thrown two career passes. He’ll have running back Roy Helu behind him, who despite starting just two games in 2008, led the team in rushing yards (803) and rushing touchdowns (7).

Fans hope Pelini, a defensive coach by trade, can bring back the Blackshirts. They’ll rally around 6’4″, 300-pound, senior defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh, who led the Husker defense in tackles (85), sacks (7.5), interceptions (2 … really, he led the team in picks??), QB hurries (7) and seconds on extra gravy boats at the Omaha Cracker Barrel.

Scheduling is where the Huskers get the biggest break. Yes, they have to play Oklahoma, but it’s in Lincoln. Yes, they have to go to Columbia and Lawrence, but the Tigers and Jayhawks have scheduling problems of their own. In the usual battle of attrition in the Big 12 North, Nebraska should be the team coming out on top and playing for the Big 12 Championship in December.

2. Kansas

The force is strong in Lawrence with pequeña signal-caller Todd Reesing returning for his senior season, and All-American candidate wideout Dezmon Briscoe (he’s still wide open down the sidelines, Venables … cover his ass) set to become the school’s all-time receptions leader before conference play even starts. In my mind, Mark Mangino is one of the best coaches in the country and will have the Rock Chalkers in contention for the North title. In fact, they’ll probably be favored to beat Nebraska in Lawrence on November 14. However, they do have to play Oklahoma (in Lawrence, thankfully) and make trips to Lubbock and Austin. That’s potentially three losses right there and dropping that many games in the North this year will have you sitting at home watching the Big 12 CCG.

3. Missouri

Although they’re the two-time reigning Big 12 North representative in the championship game, head coach Gary Pinkel will be retooling the offense after losing their biggest tool, Chase Daniel. All-world wideout and return specialist Jeremy Maclin will be drawing a paycheck from the Phildalphia Eagles in 2009, so Pinkel will have his cutesy, why-the-hell-are-you-calling-a-trick-play-NOW work cut out for him. Can 6’5″ quarterback Blaine Gabbert and 1,000-yard rusher Derrick Washington be enough on offense? In the Big 12 North, maybe. However, they open conference play with Nebraska, then go to Stillwater seven days later and come back home the next week to host Texas. Mizzou needs to win at least one of those three to have any shot at the Big 12 north title.

4. Colorado

Now we’re just drawing straws for the lower half of the North division. Colorado probably has enough talent to eek out the Kansas and Iowa ag schools, but unless they have a winning record and go bowling (doubtful and seriously doubt it), Dan Hawkins might be coaching intramurals this time next year. The Hawk may be platooning quarterbacks and running backs, and the defense loses six starters. The Buffs’ saving grace is that they get Kansas, Nebraska and Missouri all in Boulder. CU fans shudder at the thought of roadtrips to Austin and Stillwater, though.

5. Kansas State

Goodnight, sweet Prince. Hello again, Bill Snyder. The Wildcat fanbase doesn’t even acknowledge having a B.S. (before-Snyder) football program and, well, maybe they’re right. Snyder did accomplish one of the major turnarounds in college football history, taking the worst program in the history of the sport and making them conference title contenders. However, that was the Big 8. Snyder’s biggest win? A Big 12 conference title game shellacking over OU. The Wildcats must go to Norman on Halloween this year and unless he can raise the ghost of Darren Sproles, that one could get ugly. Other road trips to Lincoln and Lubbock mean … well, you get the picture.

6. Iowa State

A new year, a new Auburn DC running the ship in Ames. Surely Paul Rhoads can’t do worse than Gene Chizik’s two years there. I’ll put on my Harry Carey voice (just go with it) and ask: how does a guy who went 5-19 get the head coach position at Auburn? Austen Arnaud is a talented quarterback, but he might have to carry the load by himself. Unless you’re Vince Young (and he’s not), a one-man show is not going to win in Lawrence, Columbia and Lincoln. ISU also draws OSU and Baylor (in Ames) out of the South. The Bears’ Robert Griffin already went apeshit on the Cyclones once – he may just do it again.

A new year, a new set of challenges across the Big 12 landscape.

Who will be the preseason glamour boy who falters early, causing us to question why we ever put him on that pedestal in the first place (whither Chase Daniel)? Who is Mike Leach going to have throw the ball eleventy-million times a game, making us go “gosh, where’d he find THIS guy?” Who’s going to feel like they got “screwed” at the end of the season, paying no attention to their own foibles that got them in their mess to begin with?

Picking another winner, I see.

Ladies and gentlemen, and TaW readers, without further adieu, we present to you … the 2009 Big 12.

As we alluded to over the weekend, this begins a six-week series breaking down each team’s chances this fall. Obviously, some (OU, Texas, Nebraska) will have better chances than others (Iowa State, Colorado, Aggy). We’ll start breaking down the Big 12 North later this week, but for now, let’s take a look at who we think has the best shot at surviving the standing 8 at the end of the year.

It'll be hard to go unscathed this year, yo.

Big 12 champion

If you think you’re going to get anybody but Oklahoma in this slot on an OU blog, you’re delusional. You also haven’t paid attention to OU’s six Big 12 titles (seven appearances in the Big 12 CCG) in the past nine years. The Sooners’ main weapon in winning the last three straight titles is the fact that nobody can touch them in Norman, meaning you can pretty much chalk up four conference wins right there (Baylor, Kansas State, A&M, OSU). Stoops is an astonishing 60-2 at Owen Field and the Sooners have the nation’s longest home winning streak at 24 straight. That’s not to say OU doesn’t have any potential minefields, though. They’ll have one of the toughest schedules in the country, which includes a trip to Miami (I don’t care what their record says, Miami at Miami speaks for itself), a game in Lubbock where OU has lost two straight and … oh yeah: October 17 in Dallas.

The Sooners are looking for a four-peat in 2009.

Big 12 runner-up

The North sacrificial lamb representative has usually been a process of elimination with the past couple of years, Missouri showing up by virtue of having actual talent on the field (sorry, Kansas). This year, it’s Nebraska. Although Bo Pelini’s v2.1 Cornhusker squad will be replacing quarterback Joe Ganz (presumably his brother Cherry won’t come looking for him) and running back Marlon Lucky, we think quarterback Zac Lee (what we’ve seen of him) can at least manage to turn around and hand the ball to RB Roy Helu, who ran for 803 yards last year. Defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh (whose name in the Cameroon Ngema tribe means “House of Spears” – no, we’re not making that up) is being compared to a jumbo-sized Rich Glover.

Bowl teams

This is where the Big 12 should make a good showing with as many as 8 teams playing postseason games.

BCS teams

No surprise here. OU and Texas are both good enough and both team’s schedules line up (although for opposite reasons) well enough to get them both into marquee bowls. Who goes to the Rose Bowl playing for all the marbles and who is in the Fiesta against a Big 10 patsy will be determined in October.

Cotton Bowl

Nebraska gets a break on the Big 12 South rotation (they get Oklahoma and Tech at home, then have to play Baylor in Waco) and should look good enough come December that even a loss in the Big 12 CCG should send them back to Dallas for this one.

Holiday Bowl

Look for the winner of the November 14 game in Stillwater to get an invitation to San Diego. The outlook from here says it will be OSU over Texas Tech, which should dovetail into the …

Alamo Bowl

Although technically the Gator Bowl could take a Big 12 team before the guys in San Antonio get a chance, you know the San Antonio city officials would just love to have the Sand Aggies at the Alamodome and their fans stumbling around the Riverwalk for a weekend.

Gator Bowl

Should the Alamo pick first, that means we’re likely to see somebody like Kansas in Jacksonville. The Jayhawks have a BCS win on their resume and would be a very attractive pick. However, if they’re able to ambush Nebraska in Lawrence on November 14, all bets are off here.

Sun Bowl

Their fans might be disappointed after going to the Big 12 championship the past two years, but at least Missouri wouldn’t have to deal with an Oklahoma woodshedding in El Paso. Mizzou faces big tests on the road at Stillwater (yeah, I said it) and neutral site games with Kansas and Illinois. They get Texas and Nebraska in Columbia, which should at least give them better odds in those games.

Insight, Independence or Texas Bowl

This is where the WAGging starts. You know what? Screw it. Baylor’s going bowling, folks. Put em in the Texas or Independence Bowl and they’ll travel, too. If the Baptists (and Robert Griffin, they probably don’t even care if worships the devil at this point) are playing past November, they won’t mind where.

Here we are, folks. The heat is bearing down, we’re relegated to watching Tour de France and tennis (I’m sure some of you are actually baseball fans) and we’re pat-pat-patting our feet in anticipation of late August and early September.

Well, it’s closer than we think. Students will be returning to campus in about a month, meaning fall practices will be starting around the same time. We at TaW are itching to get going now, though.

So, to cure your football fix through the heat and anticipation in July, we’re going to bring you a six-week series previewing the fortunes of all 12 conference teams and their coaches.

We’ll start this week with Nebraska and culminate in August with your Oklahoma Sooners. Here’s a preview of what to expect:

Week of July 6

Nebraska

In his first full season at the helm of the Cornhuskers, Bo Pelini improved a 5-7 team in 2007 to 9-4 in 2008. ponderos will look at what the defensive-minded Pelini can do to capitalize on the Huskers’ big bowl win over Clemson and what the Big Red will look like with junior Zac Lee taking over from the prolific Joe Ganz under center.

Just sayin ...

Week of July 13

Missouri

How will Mizzou look in the post-Chase Daniel era? We’ll find out a lot about Gary Pinkel’s coaching ability as he cobbles together an offense without the talents of Daniel and all-everything receiver Jeremy Maclin.

Iowa State

The Cyclones are hoping that another ex-Auburn defensive coordinator, Paul Rhoads, can turn around the fortunes from the mess left behind by Gene Chizik. ISU is paying Rhoads a reported $5.75 million over 5 years, so at least the financial commitment is there. ponderos will examine ISU’s upcoming 2009 season, which will ride and fall on the shoulders of second-year starter, dual-threat quarterback Austen Arnaud.

Week of July 20

Colorado

Is Dan Hawkins on the hot seat? He’s 8-17 in his three years in Boulder and has yet to have a winning season. TaW’s Blatant Homer will talk about whether Hawkins can put enough wins together in 2009 to save his job.

Kansas

Mark Mangino might be the most underrated coach in the country. He’s 3-1 in bowl games since taking over in 2002, including a big BCS win in the 2007 FedEx Orange Bowl. Oread Boom Kings’ Hiphopopotamus will give a Kansas fan’s perspective of the 2009 season, which will no doubt include a look at quarterback Todd Reesing, who might just be the best signal-caller in the Big 12 north this year.

Week of July 27

Kansas State

“Sleepless in Manhattan” returns to the Purple Power this year as Bill Snyder tries to turn around a program that unceremoniously dumped Ron Prince under dubious circumstances. TaW’s Coach Bo has a, ahem … special affinity for the Wildcats and will bring a unique perspective to the KSU 2009 preview. Don’t forget your Power Towel!

Baylor

TaW’s Big 12 South coverage will begin in Waco where the preseason excitement hasn’t been this high in over 20 years when Grant Teaff was at the helm. Sophomore quarterback Robert Griffin is for real and is already giving coaches around the Big 12 gameplanning fits (H/T, Mike Sherman). TaW’s Blatant Homer will preview the Bears’ 2009 chances under second-year head coach Art Briles, who already has an A&M pelt on his wall and scared the bejeezus out of Tech and Missouri last season.

Week of August 3

Texas Tech

It bears repeating: Tech beat Texas last year. The single-biggest win in corsair Mike Leach’s career caused the entire Longhorn nation to collectively and permanantly lodge their panties in their cracks. The Tortilla Retort’s dedfischer will look at the monumental task Leach has in front of him this year after losing quarterback Graham Harrell and All-American wideout Michael Crabtree.

Oklahoma State

How many years will OSU be a program on the rise? Mike “I’m a man!” Gundy had his Cowboys in the Top 10 at one time last year and many feel they should be there in the preseason, mainly due to dual-threat quarterback Zac Robinson. TaW’s duncansooner takes one for the team to research and document the Pokes’ 2009 season. No word on if he’ll offend any mothers … of children.

Week of August 10

Texas A&M

Second-year head coach Mike Sherman (4-8 in his first year at College Station) would be on one of the hottest seats in the country were it not for other problems in College Station. TaW will look at whether the Sherminator can solve the myriad of problems facing the Aggies in 2009, which include doing something about a 3-10 record to the Lubbock Sand Aggies since the inception of the Big 12, and what looks to be an ugly trip to Norman.



Don't you wish you had him back, Aggies?

Texas

BCS-gate, Asterisk-gate and another year without a conference title. Sounds like nothing much has changed for Mack Brown and the Horns. They’re pinning their hopes on a 2-1 record in the last 3 games against Oklahoma, though. TaW will look at UT’s fortunes with third-place Heisman finisher Colt McCoy returning for his senior season and Sergio Kindle trying desperately to stay on the team, barring his turning any more west campus housing into a Junior’s Party Barn drive-thru.



Add that to the trophy case, Mack.

Week of August 17

Oklahoma

Is this the year Stoops finally gets over the BCS hump? Some publications are putting OU’s defense as tops in the country. Indeed, the Sooners’ defensive line could rival the Harris-Dvoracek front from the early 2000s. Heisman winner Sam Bradford will have to prove his worth after losing four of five of his guys up front, but he still has dangerous weapons like two 1,000-yard rushers in DeMarco Murray and Chris Brown, plus the freakishly-talented Jermaine Gresham.

Tim Griffin over at ESPN.com actually gives off some light during the darkness of nuclear football winter with yesterday’s entry.

Musing about who is the best Big 12 coach, Griffin took on the logical task of compiling the records for every Big 12 coach since the league’s inception.

At the top of the list? No surprise: Bob Stoops and Mack Brown, with Stoops edging out Mack .839 – .802 overall, due to five more Big 12 Championship wins.

There are several interesting takeaways from this, other than the ones Griffin pulled out that showed R.C. Slocum and Frank Solich are the two most underrated coaches in league history and Callahan sucked balls (didn’t need fancy stats for that one).

What he didn’t bring up or acknowledge is how utterly dominant Stoops is against the rest of the conference. We at TaW will gladly take on that task, natch. Before we get into it, think hard about the only coach in Big 12 history who has a winning record versus Stoops. The answer will appear at the end of this post. No cheating!

For discussion purposes below, here are the records, courtesy of Griffin:

Note: Active coaches are in yellow. Iowa State coach Paul Rhoads will be in his first season as a head coach in the conference.

With a 73-14 (overall) record, Stoops is tied with Brown in wins, but Coach Whine has four more losses (thanks to one more year in the league than Stoops). There’s a severe dropoff after that, though, as the two have almost 20 more wins than the third-place coach, sleepy Bill Snyder (54-29).

Nowhere is Stoops’ domination of the conference better exemplified than with his six conference championships, three of them coming in the past three years. No other Big 12 coach has more than one Big 12 championship trophy and, in fact, only one three coaches have more than two appearances. Even Gary Barnett was 1-3 in the Big 12 CCG, but his appearances were largely due to the suckness of the Big 12 North.

There’s another way to check the pwnage, though, and it concerns something OU’s rivals love to point out: head-to-head.

Of the other 32 coaches to ever head a Big 12 football program, only one has a winning record versus Stoops. It’s obviously not Brown, it’s not Barnett and it’s certainly not Mike Gundy. To illustrate just how dominant this stat is, there are only nine of the 32 who have ever beaten Stoops:

Brown 4 (4-6 overall)
Leach 2 (2-7)
Miles 2 (2-2)
Barnett 1 (1-4)
Hawkins 1 (1-1)
Snyder 1 (1-5)
Solich 1 (1-1)
Slocum 1 (1-3)
Dykes 1 (1-0)

Mack has the most number of wins against Stoops at four, which when compared to the rest of these records, should be considered a resounding success. The UT athletic department should commission a ring or a trophy to celebrate being number one again.*

Franchione wins the futility award for being 0-6 versus versus Stoops with two different teams (A&M, Bama). Overall, he’s 0-7 versus Oklahoma with three different squads (A&M, Bama, TCU). We really need to somehow get this guy on the schedule again.

Finally, if you guessed that Spike Dykes was the only coach in Big 12 history to have a winning record against Stoops, congratulate yourself.

After spending the better part of the offseason taking his whining to a whole new level of bitchery, Mack Brown will not be participating in a discussion of Big 12 rules in Phoenix, instead sending some lackey named Cleve.

'Scuse me while I whip this out.

Surely there’s a good excuse for Mack not participating in a discussion of the Big 12 rule that penalized punished reminded UT that they actually lost to Tech. To be sure, Mack’s wife Sally just happened to schedule a heart transplant appendectomy amputation tumor removal second wrist surgery to coincide with the discussions in Phoenix.

This could work out to Mack’s and UT’s benefit, though. After screwing up in a big game next year, then whining that the rules are unfair and that the loss shouldn’t count, Mack can always say he didn’t know the rules because he wasn’t there. That’s been working pretty well for him lately.

In fairness, Mack may be a flippin genius for this little maneuver. Built-in excuses for not winning titles – FTW!